Ensuring Happiness in Love

Condensed from Man’s Supersensory and Spiritual Powers by Geoffrey Hodson

Happy marriages can be scientifically planned and the drastic surgery of divorce can be avoided, or at least only resorted to when there proves to be no other possible solution. What should we find if we were to look into a home where the happiness of the first years of marriage is slipping away from those who had longed and hoped for permanent happiness together? We would find one or more of the many known causes of marital discord. Here is a list of them, 1) Jealousy, 2) different spare-time interests, 3) failure to retain friendly and sociable contacts with the outside world, 4) immaturity in one or both partners, 5) boredom in carrying out the routine of home-making and home keeping, and the avoidance of unpleasant duties. There are, of course, other causes of unhappiness, such as too marked religious and facial differences, frustration in the marriage relationship and even infidelity, whether of thought alone or also in practice. Indulgences, too, can break up a home and amongst the most common of these is alcoholism, gambling, drug taking and any other excesses are equally destructive.

The Art of Giving and Preserving Happiness: The fact is that the attainment and preservation of happiness in marriage is a fine art which requires constant and close attention, much skill and ready humor if it is to be successfully pursued. The joys and fulfillments of marriage only come as a reward for deep and faithful love, intelligence, understanding and the recognition that marriage is a living thing which survives only by constant renewal. Love for beauty’s sake alone, often characteristic of love’s first awakening does not generally prove sufficient. It must deepen into love for friendship’s sake, tenderness and a desire to be a comfort to each other. This cannot be achieved if the small things essential to the smooth functioning of a home are neglected, meals are hastily contrived, housework is unorganized, personal reading at meals and afterwards is indulged in from which the other is excluded or, failure in the husband himself to share his leisure and his interests with his wife and family and vice versa.

© "Theosophical Digest" (4th Quarter 2000) published by Theosophical Publishing House, 1 Iba Street, 1114 Quezon City, Philippines. Website: www.theosophy.ph. Reprinted with permission.

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